1. Magna Carta, and the writ of Habeas Corpus, allowing appeal against unlawful imprisonment
2. Hanged, drawn and quartered
3. Apples falling from trees and apple pies (not originally English, but in the local restaurant they serve the very best apple pie ever)
4. Discovering America (OK, not really English but they were not very far behind)
5. Killing natives for not being civilised wherever they were found
6. Sending the best of breed to Australia and giving them independent, thus creating one of the best countries in the world
7. Losing America to the Americans, so they could help us in WWII
8. The first time machine (London underground is the only known creation in which time can stop or even go backwards)
9. Cancellation of the Habeas Corpus for 42 days
10. Privatisation of everything, thus raising generations of governments that don’t know what financial accountability means (or any other accountability).
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Melinda_blog
- 22/06/2008 @ 13:09:36
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I like it. No other evidence needed.
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Melinda_blog
- 22/06/2008 @ 14:31:43
And that proves they weren't originally English?
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absolutly.
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Melinda_blog
- 22/06/2008 @ 16:01:37
In other words, you dislike all things English?
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Don't jump to conclusions
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Melinda_blog
- 22/06/2008 @ 21:11:59
You like it.
In your own words, this is sufficient evidence to prove that it cannot be English.
If that is all the evidence we have, we have to conclude that the syllogism is as follows:
First (stated) premise: 'Ran likes apple pie'
Second (implied) premise: 'Ran dislikes all things English'
Conclusion: 'Apple pie is not English'
Anything else would not be logical, captain.
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Fortunately, I am not as consistent as logic
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Melinda_blog
- 23/06/2008 @ 07:27:13
Very fortunately
Also fortunately, I am not easily offended. So I will continue to talk to you.-
it wasn't meant as an offence. It is just that I am closer to a human than to a Turing Machine
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Melinda_blog
- 23/06/2008 @ 07:39:07
Good to know
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Prettyintelligentprincess
Pro - 22/06/2008 @ 15:39:33
I can feel the tangible quality of your satire!
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CassandraofTroy
- 23/06/2008 @ 08:11:23
I wouldn't dare make such a list about your nation because that would, quite rightly, make me a bigot.
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technomist
- 24/06/2008 @ 18:07:39
To do so is in such bad taste, and actually pointless, unless played sometime after the fifth pint and beofre moving on to the spirits as an additional round in 10 Famous Belgians, another great English invention.
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CassandraofTroy
- 24/06/2008 @ 21:34:39
Magritte, Herge, Rubens, Breughel, Simenon, Jacques Brel, err...
I was only there last week, and I've forgotten already-
tin tin?
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CassandraofTroy
- 25/06/2008 @ 07:08:00
That was kind of implicit in Herge... but if we can count him separately, maybe we can count Snowy too???
(I think Haddock and the Thompson Twins are all supposed to be English).
Oh, and last night I remembered Eddie Merkx (but only because I read about him last week in the Rough Guide to Brussels). -
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and I thought I was complimenting England. After all, nor every country can find gravity, make great apple pies and create the Magna Carta.
I am always happy to find out what people take offence to.
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CassandraofTroy
- 25/06/2008 @ 07:14:47
I wasn't really offended. And I agree with you (especially over 9 and 10).
It was more to do with thinking about how different nations react to that kind of thing. And what nations it is somehow acceptable to talk about in that way, while with others it would be regarded as bigotry.
Oh to hell with it, lets just take the piss out of the Americans, we can all agree on that
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on the other hand, I don't really care about America (and I do about England) and I find it pretty hard to understand how the English accept all the crap bestowed upon them (like reducing quality of train services to nil while increasing the prices beyond any reasonable level, claiming that the fat profit margin for shareholders are being eroded) and taking it as Force majeure, rather than something that can be changed.
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CassandraofTroy
- 25/06/2008 @ 07:51:10
Couldn't agree more
We have a great fondness for moaning rather than action.
But continuing my point (which I've been thinking about in the shower
), I think it's about power.
Nations, or groups, which are perceived to be (or have been) powerful are considered fair game, while those who have a history of being oppressed are not.
But of course, power relations change over time, and these perceptions don't always keep up with them.-
You know what I find bad attitude? When I criticize I often hear the comments: “if you don’t like it go to where you come from”. I criticize because I care, because if I didn’t care I wouldn’t live here.
There are so many great things about England, but we seem to do so much to make sure we destroy them. So I criticize. This is the way I am at work. I find what is wrong, highlight it and then try to fix it. As a foreigner in the UK, I can only highlight, not fix.
I think that those who accept and not criticized are those who don’t care. Those are the one that should go somewhere else. Because if you don’t care what’s happening around you, you do not belong.
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CassandraofTroy
- 25/06/2008 @ 09:22:48
That was gong to be my next comment
Seriously, I too had the choice whether to live here or elsewhere, and it was mainly my decision that we came back (as the alternative was Texas, it wasn't too hard, though many people couldn't understand it). And I've never regretted it.
I guess I'm the guiltiest when it comes to criticising and not taking action. I think many of the problems we see today are the working out of decisions made decades ago - like your example of rail privatisation. Those of us who could see at the time what was likely to happen and tried to protest weren't listened to then and aren't listened to now. This is why I chose my blog name - I'm very good at seeing that things are going horribly wrong, but powerless to do anything about any of it.
Actually, these days I feel more European than British. Yet I still love England. I guess it's like your parents, you'll always love them, even if you don't always know why.-
that means as long as you don't think too much why?
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CassandraofTroy
- 26/06/2008 @ 07:06:38
It means, if I try to think why, I can't articulate an answer which convinces me, let alone anyone else, I know any answers I come up with are just being made up to give a convenient answer to that question, and probably wouldn't stand up to close scrutiny. It's because I was born here, grew up here, and have lived most of my life here, and when I lived elsewhere I thought I could never be happy till I returned here (of course, I wasn't happy even then, but that's another issue).
It's too much a part of me to make an objective judgement.-
elsewhere though is far from being conclusive. As my daughter keeps asking us to go back. She keeps saying: " of course the English like it here they don't know any better, but we do"
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CassandraofTroy
- 26/06/2008 @ 09:02:37
Of course, she wants to go back to where she is used to, just as I did when I lived in the States.
I'm not claiming this is the best country in the world, just that it is my home. That is the whole point of my comment. -
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so I am sure that you are happy to discover that some people are more daring.
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CassandraofTroy
- 24/06/2008 @ 21:57:52
Oh, I can think of lots of people who are more daring.
I just wouldn't want to emulate them.-
lucky for us that people are different then
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CassandraofTroy
- 25/06/2008 @ 07:14:59
Indeed
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kiki2u
- http://www.kikita.blog.co.uk
- 09/07/2008 @ 23:49:24
LOL Ran!
Posting this in a UK blog?!!! You're brave -
On 3, I'd like to know your evidence for saying apple pies were not originally English. Given that apples have been grown here and pastry made here for centuries,I'd be surprised if it wasn't. Or did you mean to say 'not uniquely English'?